Experto Creed

Sound familiar?
Thomas A. Fudge, in his manual for debunking UPC myths aptly entitled Christianity Without the Cross, discusses the importance of music in UPC churches. Devoting over 20 pages to this topic, Fudge examines some of the most basic hymns of the "Apostolic" faith as well as contemporary (at the time of publication) songs sung by choirs like IBC - songs like "Jesus on the Main Line," "I Have Been Born Again," and "There Will be Light". Fudge writes:

The expressions of worship appeared to be a powerful collective religious experience facilitated through music. Indeed, Pentecostal altar calls are seldom without music and the powerful move of the Holy Ghost is rarely observed without the presence of music.... It was a 'peak experience' for Oneness Pentecostals characterized by worship fulfillment and intense expression. The ethnography of Pentecostalism is revealed here and the kinetic and proxemic dimensions of ritual worship likewise find expression and possible fulfillment. (Fudge, 2003, p. 311)

Essentially, Fudge is suggesting that a Pentecostal church service depends almost entirely on music to metaphorically "set the stage." Indeed, even the Holy Ghost, at least the kind Pentecostals worship, appears to move almost exclusively through music. I ask my still-UPC friends, what role does music play in your church? Where was the music on the Day of Pentecost?

That aside, the "hymnology" and musical expressions of worship in the UPC and similar denominations also tend to be extremely repetitive. In my wife's first (and only) attendance at a UPC church service at The Church of Omaha, she was struck by the repetitiveness of the songs - something even I had failed to consider in my post-UPC years. Fudge almost understates this by writing, "The same message, the essential message [in a song], is repeated until it becomes part of the evolving fabric of the movement representing a Pentecostal lingua franca. Repetition does not diminish the potential for strong, emotional responses, rather it heightens the possibility" (Fudge, 2003, p. 313). Other authors have been far less kind, accusing UPC of inducing mind-altering states in congregants through significant repetition (see a chilling video here).

Below is a video from The Pentecostals of Alexandria of a song entitled "Shake the Foundation" (this was popularized by non-UPC, gospel artist John P. Kee). I am quite familiar with this song, having taught it to both the Denham Springs Youth Choir and the Leesville Adult Choir in 2002, a year and a half prior to leaving UPC. At the time the song seemed rational and logical because it would stir up "praise"; now, it seems plastic, fake, and little more than ill-disguised hype.

Notably, the young woman introducing the song and responsible for whipping the worshipers up into a frenzy, asks, "Is your praise loud enough for God to hear you tonight?" Wait a minute - did I hear that correctly? "Loud enough for God to hear you"?! Has God gone deaf? Is he waiting for us to hit just that right decibel before he'll respond?! [disclaimer: I have not met this young lady and I'm certain she's an extremely nice person. Her sincerity is well-noted and enviable. Her theology, however, is rather shaky].

She continues, "Your praise...can 'loose' somebody standing next to you." So then where did I get that "God" is the one who does the "loosing"? And the hard-of-hearing-God theme continues: "I want you to give God the loudest praise, so that a 'suddenly' and an 'immediately' can happen in this room tonight. The loudest praise that you can [give]...lets him know that you want him to come right now, in this room..."


Three observations
First, and this will irritate quite a few of my non-UPC readers, how does UPC justify its literal interpretation of the passages on the length of women's hair in First Corinthians, yet ignore passages in the same chapter that discuss it being a "shame" for a woman to speak in church? Hear me out, I am not advocating that women become second-class citizens in our churches in any form. I have taken this into consideration when choosing a church to attend after moving cross-country because I don't want to be part of treatment of women that is disrespectful and chauvinistic. Regardless of my feelings on this issue, however, it seems considerably disingenuous to claim that the passage on hair is applicable in the modern culture while claiming that Paul's writings about the reduced role of women in First Corinthians, First Timothy, and Titus do not apply.

Second, the amount and level of both hype and repetition should be obvious. The song "Shake the Foundation" has 4 words total. Okay, that's an exaggeration, but my point remains. Notice the mosh pit up front at the altar. It's quite clear that praise, in the UPC/Apostolic/Charismatic paradigm, is equivalent to rabid physical manifestations found only in clubs, high school dances, and the Crazy Fan Section of professional sports venues.

Finally, it appears the young lady in the video is actually correct about having to be louder so God can hear them. Eerily reminiscent of Elijah's taunts to the Prophets of Baal to sing louder - perhaps he's sleeping? - this video reminds me that the UPC God that demands loud praise, rote obedience to a strict dress code, belief in the schizophrenia of Jesus Christ (I am my own Father), and the necessity that one babble in a non-language repeatedly to be saved is a god, not God. This is not the God of the Bible. This is not the God who lovingly, tenderly sacrificed his son for our eternal (and pre-existent) salvation. This is not the God who made a covenant with Abraham. This is not the God who promises "I will be with you until the end of the Earth."

No, this god is slightly deaf. A bit slow on the uptake (hence the repetition). And remarkably legalistic. He, after all, is the UPC god.